Film Review: Slaughterhouse Rulez

“That Hole Is A Gateway. And It Leads, Straight Down, To Hell. Now, Who Wants To Buy Some Drugs..?”

Juggling the role of front-man for the psychedelic rock band, Kula Shaker, alongside recently venturing into the world of cinematic endeavours, the multi-talented Crispian Mills reunites with Simon Pegg (Mission: Impossible – Fallout) after the 2012 independent horror comedy, A Fantastic Fear of Everything, with Slaughterhouse Rulez, a similarly genre bending creature feature which combines The Inbetweeners style laddish humour with a St. Trinian’s inspired backdrop which sees Finn Cole’s (Peaky Blinders) northerly Don Wallace reluctantly attend the titular upper class school, the militaristic, private education palace full with inner social class turmoil and overseen by the rather exuberant Headmaster as played by Michael Sheen (Apostle). Whilst Pegg himself can relate to starring in arguably the greatest British horror comedy of all time in the form of Shaun of the Dead, Mills’ second feature unsurprisingly fails to come anywhere close to Edgar Wright’s masterpiece, instead offering a strange concoction of Doctor Who inspired science fiction, political commentary and B-movie splatter, resulting in a ninety minute headrush of a movie which in parts is thoroughly enjoyable and laugh-out loud funny, but at other times, completely loses its’ way and slowly wanders into territory bordering on irksome, but with some of Britain’s best acting chops on show, Slaughterhouse Rulez is still amusing enough to pass the time.

With the bulk of the narrative focusing on the wretched school life entwined within the confines of the titular cathedral of knowledge, Mill’s screenplay begins in interesting fashion, introducing both Cole’s streetwise and savvy newcomer and Asa Butterfield’s (Hugo) kooky, alcohol and cigarette dependant, Willoughby Blake, as the central duo of the piece who quickly fall upon the insidious doings of a renowned fracking company who have been tasked with digging out the corpulent supply of shell gas kept under the school’s ground. Cue the nod to the Doctor Who serial “Inferno” from 1970 in which a mining disaster breeds unknown evil hostiles from beneath the surface of the earth and that’s pretty much the entire second half of Mill’s movie, just without venturing into alternative universes and apocalyptic doom. Whilst I am all for witnessing the sight of a drug-laden, hippie Nick Frost (Hot Fuzz) and violent, flesh hungry cave dwellers ripping endless hordes of cannon fodder to shreds within reason, Mills fails on a fundamental level to hold the shakey lines of genre crossing at a steady beat, resulting in a movie which not only feels way too long come the hour mark as the screenplay begins to run out of ideas good enough to hold the attention of its’ audience, but one which is neither scary or threatening, resulting in Slaughterhouse Rulez essentially being a feature length back-end episode of Torchwood with occasional slices of comedy gold and a Michael Sheen in his most camp and scenery chewing film role thus far.

Overall Score: 5/10

Film Review: Mission: Impossible – Fallout

“The End You’ve Always Feared Is Coming. It’s Coming, And The Blood Will Be On Your Hands…”

With screenplays for the likes of The Usual Suspects and Edge of Tomorrow on Christopher McQuarrie’s cinematic CV, it seemed only natural that McQuarrie would soon helm the US’s most longstanding and successful contemporary action franchise, where the transition from sole screenwriter to director has formed a winning partnership with Tom Cruise since the release of Jack Reacher in 2012 and the critically acclaimed Rogue Nation three years later. Returning to the fold this week with Fallout, the sixth Mission: Impossible release, McQuarrie reunites with the majority of his cast from Rogue Nation including Rebecca Ferguson (Life), Simon Pegg (Star Trek) and Alec Baldwin (The Departed) as Cruise’s Ethan Hunt is tasked with retrieving stolen plutonium cores before they fall into the hands of “The Apostles”, a terrorist cell with connections to “The Syndicate”, the primary antagonists from Rogue Nation which featured Sean Harris as their treacherous and anarchic leader. With spectacle in abundance, a barrage of breathless action sequences and an editing pace which holds your head in a storm of jaw-dropping disbelief, Fallout is the ultimate summertime blockbuster, an action movie which mixes style and substance as the best genre movies always do and a shining example of how a series can expand and improve when made with such precision and expertise.

With the franchise in general being more and more renowned for Cruise’s lust for practicality when it comes to stunts and set pieces, Fallout features some of the series’ best examples yet of Cruise at his most insane and death-defying. Whether it be a high-speed The Dark Knight inspired vehicle heist, a Casino Royale and Jason Bourne-esque rooftop chase, or a concluding aerial helicopter pursuit which channelled the opening act of Sam Mendes’ Spectre, Fallout perfectly blends the lines between fiction and reality, offering high-octane action on a constant basis in front of beautiful cinematography by Rob Hardy (Ex Machina, Annihilation) which makes you question how exactly a film which sees Cruise being put through the absolute wringer can be made without an over-reliance on digital effects. With an opening thirty minutes which does strangely drag after being bulked down with a crescendo of generic spy-genre exposition, Fallout isn’t perfect but is undoubtedly saved by the remaining two hours which provide a cracking amount of evidence for being the best example of the genre since Mad Max: Fury Road, and with Cruise and co. so obviously enjoying exploring the capacity for how far the action genre can be pushed to the limit before certain death, from an audience perspective, long may it continue.

Overall Score: 8/10

Film Review: Ready Player One

“This Isn’t Just A Game. I’m Talking About Actual Life And Death Stuff…”

With The Post earlier this year garnering a wide flurry of Oscar nominations and a critical consensus which boarded on the side of rousing positivity, a return to form for director Steven Spielberg after the yawn-inducing mediocrity of The BFG was welcomed with open arms, and with only three months since its’ release here in the UK, Spielberg returns once again to the movie-fold with Ready Player One, a cinematic adaptation of Ernest Cline’s 2011 science fiction adventure novel of the same name. Projected in 3D for its’ preview screening release, Spielberg’s latest primarily focuses on Tye Sheridan’s (X-Men: Apocalypse) Wade Watts, a slum-stricken teen who uses the environment of the OASIS, a virtual reality gaming platform created by Mark Rylance’s (Dunkirk) recently deceased James Halliday, to both escape his daily slumber and more importantly, to join many others in the hunt for three “Easter Eggs” left within the game by Halliday before his death which give the finder both riches beyond belief and the key to control of the entire OASIS itself. With pop culture references galore and an upbeat, heroic sensibility, Spielberg’s latest undeniably should work in the hands of a filmmaker renowned for popcorn delights, but with a brain scorching over-reliance on digital effects and a screenplay both absent of emotion and effective engagement, Ready Player One doesn’t work as a whole and is merely saved by individual elements which make it passable rather than thoroughly entertaining.

With an obvious social commentary regarding the nature and impact of modern technology, Spielberg’s movie mixes the subversive ideas within Cronenberg’s Existenz and Videodrome with a obvious love for the science fiction genre in its’ eye-watering levels of on-screen references, levels which makes The Cabin in the Woods look like a passing fling with its’ respective horror genre, but too a staggering amount which by the half-way point does become overly tacky and cheap. With an entire segment dedicated to Stanley Kubrick’s The Shining, the set-piece is a real bottle spinner in regards to how one might respond, with my own personal obsession with Kubrick’s masterpiece resulting in a subverted distaste to seeing our on-screen heroes quickly pop through the Overlook Hotel, music cues and all, and instead making me think how I would rather be watching The Shining instead. With Ready Player One a movie which Spielberg himself has coined as the most difficult movie he’s worked on since Saving Private Ryan due to the staggering levels of visual effects, the CGI battle scenes really aren’t worth the time, particularly in a final act which boarders on George Lucas style dullness and a complete lack of character engagement when at least eighty percent of the film is spent inside the OASIS itself with digitally designed “avatars”. With Ben Mendelsohn once again resigned to Rogue One style typecasting as the film’s one-note central antagonist and a ear-scraping level of exposition heavy dialogue, Ready Player One certainly has more negative aspects than positive, and for a director who time and time again has proven that giant gargantuan science fiction spectacle is part and parcel of his day job, Spielberg’s latest annoyingly doesn’t hit the heavy heights we are all very much used to.

Overall Score: 4/10

Film Review: Star Trek: Beyond

“We’ve Got No Ship, No Crew, How’re We Going To Get Out Of This One…?

Taking the helm as only producer this time around, it is resoundingly safe to say that J. J. Abrams is the all-round geek saviour of the 20th century where long before breaking box office records and smashing countless other cinematic achievements with Star Wars: The Force Awakens, Mr. Abrams lit the fuse once again in regards to the nations’ love of Star Trek, with a brand new team of space explorers being offset with a brand new timeline, expanding the stories of the crew upon the Enterprise to new and exciting limits. Now, six years since the first Star Trek reboot, Star Trek: Beyond continues the blockbuster success of the franchise, where although it could be regarded as the weakest of the three so far, Justin Lin’s directorial space debut is solid and sometimes spectacular summer popcorn fun featuring everything you would expect from an array of actors each used to their own talents on and off-screen in the six years from which they first began their voyage into deep space, albeit if the series itself is beginning to feel ever so slightly formulaic.

Beginning with a portrayal of a day in the life of our beloved Enterprise crew, Star Trek: Beyond begins rather slowly and then ascends into a two-hour survival mission against the ominous yet dedicated figure of main antagonist Krall, played expertly by everyone’s favourite Bond hopeful, Idris Elba, and his pack of cronies, hell bent on bringing destruction to those who wronged them in the past. If anything, Krall’s role in Beyond is all too small, where although Elba’s performance is enough to make him an effective bad guy, the script just doesn’t allow his character to become complex enough to make him memorable. Of course, the one-two of Pine and Quinto brings the bromance factor to the table, sidelined by the cling-on (no pun intended) of third wheeler Bones, whilst the bad-ass duo of Zoe Saldana and Sofia Boutella gives the female characters an extensive role to bring to life. Of course, overshadowing the release of Beyond is the deeply saddening loss of Anton Yelchin, an actor lost too young and an actor whose roles in films such as Green Room and the Star Trek franchise means he will not swiftly be forgotten. Beyond is Star Trek to the T. A classic adventure with some great thrills, if not entirely up to the mark of its’ predecessors within the 21st century revival trilogy.

Overall Score: 7/10

Film Review: Absolutely Anything

Everything or Nothing

When it comes to British culture and arts, Simon Pegg surely epitomises everything that I believe is worthy of standing for in the 21st century. I mean come on, he’s a full blown geek (Kudos), he loves Doctor Who, Star Trek, and Star Wars, all of which he has or is set to play a part of (lucky bugger), and was the star of one of the greatest comedies ever to surface over the past decade or so, Shaun of the Dead. Add in to the equation the entire cast of Monty Python, with director Terry Jones of Life of Brian fame on such duties, and the final performance of the late Robin Williams, Absolutely Anything was set to be one of the greatest comedies of the year without a doubt yet the final product is something not only wholly televisual and tacky, but riddled with mis-steps and mistakes from the outset.

When schoolteacher Neil Clarke (Simon Pegg) is given the ability to do absolutely anything by a genocidal group of aliens (Monty Python Team) in order to test whether Earth is worthy of saving, he begins to put such powers to work in order to better his own life, including making fellow resident Catherine (Kate Beckinsale) fall in love with him and allowing pet dog Dennis to speak (Voiced by the late Robin Williams). When Neil begins to realise the extent to which he can change the world with such a gift, he begins to change his own ways for the better in order to unknowingly save the world from total destruction. With the entirety of Absolutely Anything riding on the goofiness of the main plot device in the form of our main characters’ new found ability, the film unfortunately feels overly bland, with the plot never really going anywhere, whilst ending in such a mashed-up way, you’d think the ending of Fantastic Four was much more in-depth and coherent. Add in to the equation a ridiculous amount of swearing for a 12A, awful jokes about misogyny and sex, and rather shocking CGI, Absolutely Anything can only be regarded as a major misstep for Pegg and co. with its’ only redeeming feature being a cast so loved the film was never set to be awful, its’ just not anything good.

Overall Score: 4/10

Film Review: Mission: Impossible – Rogue Nation

The British Invasion

It never fails to amaze me how even after years of movie companies churning out the same age-old tale of the super-spy, whether he be American or British, that even in 2015, such a story can be just as entertaining and thrilling as ever, and in the case of Mission: Impossible – Rogue Nation, the fifth entry into the cinematic series based on the American TV series of the same name, the argument that too much of the same will inevitably get boring is lost in the chaotic spectacle that is Tom Cruise’s latest run out as IMF Agent Ethan Hunt. If the first M:I showed us that stunts and deception were the core traits of the series, then Rogue Nation laps up such a notion and turns it up to eleven, with the film offering as much spectacle as all the previous entries in the series put together, whilst fully embodying the comedic element supplied by the inclusion of Simon Pegg in a clear attempt to distance itself from the darker and much tougher spy movies we have been used to recently in the form of the Bourne Series and the Craig-era of James Bond. 

In terms of the high points within the movie, the scene in which our beloved hero tracks down the leader of the so-called Syndicate during an operatic session within Vienna was a fabulous concoction of thrills, comedy and high-risk tension, with the background performance adding to the sense of drama that was occurring on-screen. Other highlights included the constant comedic output supplied by our team of agents, with Simon Pegg gratefully lapping up the chance to keep the British end up and be the star of the film in scenes in which we are reminded of how much a step-away Rogue Nation has decided to be from the darkness of say Skyfall and, I assume, Spectre, which from watching the trailer, looks even darker than its’ predecessor. Setbacks within the film include the obvious over-use of CGI in certain scenes which unfortunately only weakens the sense of reality we get from watching scenes and stunts that did not rely on CGI and were actually done FOR REAL in a George Miller-esque fashion, whilst the overarching villain in the form of Sean Harris’ Solomon Lane, won’t exactly be remembered outside of the film, with it being a rather hollow and cliched performance from start to finish. Rogue Nation therefore features a whole lot of thrills, but ultimately, a few too many spills, making it entertaining for the time-being, but definitely not something to be treasured for the long-run. Still, its’ better than M:I 2. Seriously John Woo, stop with the doves.

Overall Score: 7/10 

 

Absolutely Anything – RELEASE TRAILER!

More trailer news!

This time we have a Monty Python take very reminiscent of Bruce Almighty in the form of Absolutely Anything. With Simon Pegg as lead and co-starring Robin Williams’ final performance as the voice of Dennis the dog. Looking like a very British comedy (obviously) the humour looks to be both crude and stupid with a far more realistic approach to what someone would do with the ability to do anything!

The movie releases August 14th and is the final appearance of the late, great Robin Williams.

The Worlds End – Quicky Review – SPOILERS

A triumphant return to the Cornetto trilogy by the threesome? This is certainly debatable.

As far as stories go, The Worlds End is quite an outlandish tale. A typical alien invasion uncovered by the most obtuse group of people on a weekend of downing pints across 12 pubs, or as they call it – The Golden Mile. Throughout this, Simon Pegg causes endless amounts of trouble and uncovers this invasion. Thus leads to them trying to complete the Golden Mile while staving off the hordes of “Blanks”. It sounds fairly straightforward, yet the character back stories are fairly complicated. These backgrounds really affect each other and cause endless amounts of trouble, one of which that is most notably is Gary King’s (Simon Pegg) drinking problems.

As a comedy, it was fairly good. A collection of jokes which made you giggle and a few made the cinema roar with laughter, yet nothing hugely substantial. The other side of the coin is the action portion of the film. It is dramatically sped up and it easily noticeable, but it is aggressive, full on and just great fun. It’s also nice to see that Nick Frost played a different style of character in this instalment. Starting off as a dead beat ass with no job and no life causing controversy among the group in Shaun of The Dead, following it up with a dead beat cop with little understanding of full on police work but a love for violence to end up as a non-alcoholic whose life appears well and is still a strong, tank of a man. Speaking of actors, the rest of the fairly large cast acted extremely well and it was a present surprise to find out the Pierce Brosnan had a role within the story for a few scenes.

Visually, there are very little special effects apart from the occasional face lighting up, a piece of modern art and a large incident at the end, so for what it is, they are good and stage effects and lighting were executed perfectly, especially at the end with a haze of oranges, blues and blacks that filled the screen and wisp gently across. The music and sound side was also very good. I’m still trying to locate the trailer music for its massive bass drops, but the music kept an powerful roar throughout, that set scenes up perfectly.

As a part of a trilogy, it is certainly the weaker of the bunch. It wasn’t as stupid and over the top as the rest of the trilogy and appeared the action side of the story took a lot of the priority and then a few inner squabbles between the group that took the movie from comedy to a drama. I do recommend you see it and many of you will enjoy, but I think it shall get a 7/10. It’s funny but takes itself a little too seriously at points and could have done with a few more jokes. Sorry for another quicky review but its been a a few late nights and early mornings!

(PS – It uses the word C**T. If you don’t like this, you may have a little trouble dealing with the movie.)

Trailer Analysis: The World’s End

“Analysis is probably a better phrase about what I’m writing about rather then review”   

So here it is, the final movie of Edgar Wright’sCornetto trilogy “The worlds end”. If you haven’t seen the other two, I really recommend you do, both “Shaun of the Dead” and “Hot-Fuzz” are amazingly entertaining and damn right hilarious.

“20 years after attempting an epic pub crawl, five childhood friends reunite when one of them becomes hell bent on trying the drinking marathon again. They are convinced to stage an encore by mate Gary King, a 40-year old man trapped at the cigarette end of his teens, who drags his reluctant pals to their home town and once again attempts to reach the fabled pub, The World’s End. As they attempt to reconcile the past and present, they realise the real struggle is for the future, not just theirs but humankind’s. Reaching The World’s End is the least of their worries” (The World’s end official Facebook page)

Edgar Wright (director), Simon Pegg and Nick Frost are back once again with the final addition to the Corntto trilogy. However this time they are joined by a few more additions to the cast, such as Martin Freeman who was in Hot-Fuzz for a few scenes but luckily he is playing a bigger role this time as Oliver; one of the pub crawlers, I’m greatly looking forward to seeing his performance. Also including Rosamund Pike, Paddy Considine, David Bradley and the talented Eddie Marson. All of these amazing and well known actors in one production, is sure to be an awesome show and I can’t wait.

Now it wouldn’t be a Cornetto film if there wasn’t a pub involved and what a way to finish the series with a good old pub-crawl. In an IGN interview, Simon Pegg claimed that their films are very British. Pubs are British and they are a part of our culture, so it makes sense to make films around pubs.

This film has a lot more computer animated effects then their other films. With all of the glowing eyes and robots this could be influenced by “Paul” which they released back in 2011. The effects are not bad or brilliant by avatar standards but this is a British comedy film, I’m not expecting anything big like that, but its still good to see.

I am glad that they have kept some of the traditions from there previous films such as the pubs but also some of the comedy scenes, such as the fence hopping at the end of the trailer, which fans of the trilogy would have immediately recognised, but still tweaking it to keep it original, perfect. But they also keep that pub violence against a mass of people which I love, for example in Shaun of the dead it was zombies, hot-fuzz the village cult and now robots looks awesome.

So the film comes out on July 19th and i will defiantly go see it in the cinemas to give you all a full review. “So prepare to get annihilated and a little hungover”.  

Also check out these trailers : https://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=7ibQvQUpMTg

Star Trek – Into Darkness REVIEW -SPOILERS-

Welcome back to Black Ribbon Reviews!

J.J Abrams has done it again, Into darkness is a brilliantly made film and visually beautiful. Star Trek was always controversial with its use of current situations to display through popular culture and really helped to revolutionise the casting for productions of all type and style. Abrams has held the classic integrity and uses Kahn to represent the terrorist threat of Al Qaeda.

In the opening of the movie, we follow a chase scene through a vivid red forest of a sheathed Kirk who is being chased by aliens with white faces in bright yellow clothing. The contrast of colour is amazing and certainly needs to be seen on the big screen to truly appreciate it. Once this introduction scene is over, we are introduced to our bad guy for the evening; Khan. Any Trekkie will know this name from an older Star Trek film “Wrath of Kahn” (Yet I’m no Trekkie and was still aware of this!). Then some explosions happen and Kirk travels into enemy territory to kick some butt, only to find the Kahn is a one man army who is superior to everyone.

Visually this movie is flawless. I can’t help but think of what it would have looked like in 3D. Set designs were extensive and modern. Building were a mix of classic with a splash of modern architecture. The CGI is exactly the same. The Enterprise looked lifelike and when it shot into warp it kept its definition and colour without being stretched and looking ridiculous. The fight scenes were also executed very well. However some of the movements seemed over exaggerated and could have done with a little less super hero effects.

With a collection of the current biggest actors, this film isn’t short of brilliant performances. Chris Pine does a brilliant representation of Kirk, his facial expressions blend and he acts with ease and efficiency. Benedict Cumberbatch’s portrayal of Kahn is admirable, however I felt his facial expressions are a little over the top and as much as they help convey anger, they make him look like he is sobbing or having a tantrum. Apart from this he plays Kahn well. However, Karl Urban who plays Bones (the doctor dude) is very annoying. I’m not sure if it is the character or him. Bones likes to say “Dammit” a lot and spout some poetry, yet Karl doesn’t help when he doesn’t have the ability to move any facial muscles to make him smile for once. He looks like he has been hit with a spade and is still reeling from the shock. The rest of the cast are very good and all play there parts brilliantly.

The initial story for Into Darkness is very simple. Kahn is killing people, Stop him. Yet deeper into the story we are confronted by another evil using Kahn for his gain and Kirk and Kahn team up to stop this threat. I’m not going to ruin the plot for you but stuff goes down! Expect a few plot twists.

Overall this movie is beautifully shot, written and executed. With fluid fight scenes and witty one liners the story doesn’t lose its charm, but isn’t diminished by the gritty aspect of the story. I recommend seeing it and I agree with IMDB’s rating for it. 8.5/10